


Hang On

by orphan_account



Series: Cling (OT5) [2]
Category: Crisis Core: Final Fantasy VII
Genre: Canon Divergence - Modeoheim, M/M, OT5, S/G/Z/A/C, Suicidal Thoughts, Suicide Attempt, Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-23
Updated: 2015-01-23
Packaged: 2018-03-08 18:53:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,836
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3219701
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Degradation is a terrifying thing, especially when the people falling apart are so very precious to you. Sequel to Hold Tight. Sephiroth/Genesis/Zack/Angeal/Cloud. Contains some violence</p>
            </blockquote>





	Hang On

**Author's Note:**

> This chapter contains some serious mental deterioration and suicidal thoughts, especially on the part of Angeal Hewley. Please put yourself and your own health and safety first and foremost! And if you need someone to talk to, I am here!

Zack was enjoying his walk back to Sephiroth's apartment. Internally, he had started calling it 'home.' As terrible as it had all gotten, as frightened as he was by what was happening to Genesis and Angeal, Sephiroth's apartment was a tactile reminder that they were in this together. They had all moved in together, though unofficially. Of the five of them, only Cloud didn't share their space every night. It just wasn't acceptable for a trooper to visit the upper floors that much.

Zack was whistling to himself in pride and delight that his new rank as First would change that by the morning. He'd applied to have Cloud listed as his official apprentice. He'd been assured by the sadly smiling Lazard that his request should be approved in no time. After all, the Soldier program could use all the good publicity and recruits it could get.

Zack had left the meeting and gone straight downstairs to buy Lazard a fresh cup of coffee and a cookie after leaving their appointment. He knew how hard it was on him with two Soldiers so blatantly and terribly out of commission.

He was still whistling when he stepped onto the elevator, but the closer he came to their apartment, the more his good mood faded. He didn't know what he would find in there today. It could be smiling friends and lovers with dinner ready and waiting and eager kisses and loving hands, or it could be a fragile bitterness hanging over the household like an oily film, casting everything in the awful light of the degradation.

Even his worst anxieties hadn't prepared him for the sound of endless, furious screams that reached him even before the elevator reached the floor. He stared straight ahead, shocked as the sound grew louder and louder, more and more recognizable.

"Genesis!" Zack called, pressing against the doors, hardly waiting for the elevator to stop before he pried them open with sheer force, leaving the elevator buzzing in displeasure behind him as he sprinted towards the apartment, past the empty penthouse suites that Genesis and Angeal had called their own before they moved, albeit unofficially.

Sephiroth's was furthest from the elevator, and Zack fumbled with his keycard as he sprinted towards it. He underestimated his new speed, hitting the wall with a light thump, leaving a small dent as he tried to stop.

The moment he had the door open, Genesis's screams gained the physical, visceral quality of true rage. Zack slammed the door behind him and ran the few steps into the room. What he found in the living room stopped him dead in his tracks.

Genesis was all but frothing at the mouth, screaming in senseless rage. He was on his knees, his arms held at his side by Sephiroth, who was crouched behind him, holding him in place with his arms around his biceps and chest. The usually stony General had a streak of blood trailing down from his nose and a split eyebrow, a ragged look on his face. The gaze he shot at Zack was pure panic. Zack was over in a shot, though he had no idea what to do. He focused in on the first thing he could fix, and dragged Genesis's hands away from where they were tearing at Sephiroth's restraining forearms.

"Gen!" He cried, holding onto Genesis's wrists even as the man struggled against them both with all the vicious ferocity of an alligator. "Gen, calm down!"

Genesis's usually gentle eyes flashed yellow, and he jerked, lashing back at Sephiroth with his head. Sephiroth tucked his chin to avoid the assault, but Zack suddenly understood why his boyfriend's face was bloody.

"Fight me!" Genesis roared, jerking against Zack's grip on his arms. "You coward, fight me!"

"I am not going to hurt you, Genesis." Sephiroth whispered, his voice weary, as though he'd repeated this too many times, as though he'd been there for hours. "Please. Calm yourself…"

"Gen." Zack tried to draw his attention—Tried not to look at the madness in his eyes and the broad streaks of white in his hair. "Please. Calm down. You're hurting Seph."

"Good." Spat Genesis, a sneer on his perfect lips as he turned his glare on Zack. "He deserves it. Why does he—Why does he have to be so goddamn perfect while I'm falling apart!?"

"That's not fair." Zack whispered, squeezing the wrists he held gently, hating that they were thinner than they should be, hating the way they trembled under his hands either in weakness or in rage. "It's not his fault, Gen. Not the degradation, and not that he doesn't have it. You need to stop this."

"I won't!" Genesis screamed. "I swore to myself I would defeat him! I swore! I will not be treated as some frail ornament! I will—I must be his equal!"

"His equal?" Zack whispered, aching to hold Sephiroth as he watched the pain on the man's face. "Genesis, you are. You've never been less than any of us. We're all equals, that's kind of the whole boyfriends thing."

"I can't—" Genesis jerked in more of a spasm than a tug against their holds. "I can't just wither away! I will be remembered! I will defeat Sephiroth and—"

"And what?" Zack asked sharply. "Kill yourself doing it? Leave him aching or dead and all of us lonely? Abandon Angeal and Cloud and me because you were too impatient to let us find a cure?"

"Don't fucking scream at me, puppy." Genesis spat back, teeth bared. But his eyes were his own again—Furious, but achingly blue, without a trace of that uneasy yellow.

"I'm not a puppy." Zack said lowly. "It's not even an option anymore. Not with you and Angeal out of commission. Not with Sephiroth spreading himself thin making sure you stay safe. You made him bleed Gen. Over a petty fit of jealousy, you hurt him!"

"Zack, don't." Sephiroth whispered, his arms still restraining Genesis, just in case. "It's fine. He is not himself."

"It's not fine!" Zack felt his brows twist and his eyes well with tears. "Genesis, this is not… This is not okay…"

For a moment, Genesis seemed to gear up to scream again. Then whatever had possessed him internally started to fade, and he caught a hiccuping breath.

"Don't cry." The redhead whispered, his face morphed under concern. "Oh, Zack, don't cry…"

"Look at his arms." Zack whispered, his eyes sliding down to where Genesis had left blood-drenched tracks over Sephiroth's forearms. They were already healing closed, but the gory evidence left no doubt as to where the wounds had come from.

They only had a moment to look before Sephiroth had dropped his grip, moving back swiftly, escaping their prying eyes. The tatters of his jacket's sleeves hid the wounds, and he crossed his arms over his chest to prevent them from dripping any more blood onto the floor. But he couldn't hide the blood from his nose, and from a distance Zack could see a split lip as well.

"By the goddess…" Genesis whispered, staring down at his hands. "What have I…"

"Nothing." Sephiroth said firmly. "You did me no harm that will not heal within moments."

But one look at the way he shivered, and Genesis seemed to sort out the lie in that statement. He shook his head silently, expression cloaked in horror.

"I didn't mean it…" He whispered, the voice small, broken.

Sephiroth did not reply, and Zack fought back the urge to smack both their heads together. He knew Sephiroth had internalized Genesis's jealousy a long time ago. The damage had been done. Excuses could only go so far.

"It is just the degradation." Sephiroth whispered at last. "You were the one who first suggested that it was affecting your view of the world. It is no surprise that it affected your view of me… I am sorry. I did not know how to help."

His words were flat, his face cast in that blank disassociated look he put on when he was at his lowest—When he started to isolate and seclude himself. Zack could see it coming, and part of him feared it. Distance might allow him to hide his wounds, but it wouldn't heal them.

"It is…" Genesis whispered, lifting his shaking hands to his chest. "Sephiroth… Darling, please. Let me look at you?"

For a moment the Silver General shied away, and Zack could have screamed in sorrow at the sight of it. He recognized the posture—the motion. Sephiroth was expecting to be hurt again. But despite it, he forced himself forward, crouching slowly before the now seated Genesis.

He didn't pull away when blood-stained fingertips touched his bruised cheek and stroked over his split brow. The flat affect remained until the first sob escaped Genesis's lips. Then panic descended on Sephiroth the likes of which could not compare to even the fear in his eyes when Zack had entered the room.

"Are you hurt?" Sephiroth blurted, his wounded arms lifting so that he could press a hand to Genesis's chest. "Did I wound you? You are so strong I couldn't hold you gently, I tried to be careful. I'm sorry, I should have let you—"

"Don't you dare!" Genesis snapped through his tears, his fingers lifting to lock in Sephiroth's hair, anchoring them together. "Don't you dare ever let me hurt you again!"

The look of confusion in bright green eyes left Zack no option but to join the huddle, sliding a hand over each of their backs.

"Breathe, Gen." Zack whispered, even as he rubbed small circles between Sephiroth's shoulder blades in a tactile reminder to do the same. The coiled muscle under the skin didn't react to his touch in the slightest. "It's going to be okay. Sephiroth's not going anywhere. Right, Seph?"

It was manipulative. He knew it was. He shouldn't have turned that manipulation on his boyfriends, but his heart was still thrumming in fear, and the part of him that wanted to protect them needed them in one place. To split up was to be vulnerable to threat. He was already half-panicked at the thought of Angeal and Cloud being out and about.

"I am not." Sephiroth answered after a long moment, turning into Gen's touch despite the pain he'd just suffered through on his behalf. "Not unless you want me to. I know you are angry."

"I'm not." Genesis whispered. "I'm not angry with you, my dear Sephiroth. I know you're the best person you can be."

"I would give it to you if I could. My title, my genes, my rank, my health… I would give it all to you if I could." Sephiroth whispered, and the look on his face as of such exquisite agony that Genesis and Zack both drew him into a hug, holding the too-strong, too-vulnerable General in their arms as they all tried to breathe.

They stayed locked together a long while until Sephiroth decided he needed distance, drawing back a few inches. That he didn't disconnect their touches all together was a good sign. The flat affect he wore again was less of one, but Zack didn't push him. His love had obviously been trying so hard. He looked instead to Genesis, and found that he was already under the scrutiny of those warm blue eyes.

"Zackary…" Genesis's hand found Zack's hair too, brushing through it with warm affection, and Zack turned into the touch, kissing his palm.

"Thank you." He whispered. "I'm sorry. It's been getting worse. I should have mentioned. I thought I could handle it a little longer."

"What brought this on?" Zack asked softly, looking between them. "Did something happen?"

"Hollander." Sephiroth rumbled, his voice low.

"He vanished today." Genesis agreed, his head lowering. "He's the only one who knew… Exactly what Angeal and I were and…"

"Genesis was reasonably upset at the implication that Hollander has no idea how to even begin fixing the harm he has done." Sephiroth filled in when Genesis trailed off. "We were trying to decide how to approach Angeal and talk with him when I made a miscalculation."

"It was just a joke." Genesis choked in reply, guilt thick in his words. "I always like it when you make an attempt at humor. It's p-precious…"

"It was poor timing." Sephiroth whispered. "I should not have taken you off guard at a fragile time."

"Okay, we can figure out who to blame later." Zack said interrupting the recursive apologies. "For now, you both need to breathe, and get some tea, and preferably sit in each other's laps or something. Kiss lots. And Seph, you need to get cleaned up. I'm guessing I know who has dibs on that."

"Bring me the aid kit, please." Genesis agreed, turning his gaze from Zack to Sephiroth.

"It will heal on its own." Sephiroth said, though Zack shivered at the implication of the singular 'it.' Sometimes Sephiroth had a bad habit of referring to his body as a separate entity.

"No, I'm with Gen." Zack said firmly. "But you two should move to the couch. I know your joints have been giving you hell, Genesis, and gods know how long you've been on the floor."

Genesis looked suspicious after a moment, eyes flicking to Sephiroth. "How long?"

"An hour." Sephiroth murmured in reply, helping Genesis to his feet without comment on the stiff motion of the glorious redhead's legs. "Roughly."

Zack could still hear them talking as he went to get the medkit, he took a moment to catch a breath and to fight back the tears that wanted to fall.

"How long exactly." Genesis clarified, his voice catching some of its usual decisive timbre. "Don't you cheat me on the truth to spare my feelings, Sephiroth, you never have before and I would never want you to."

"Eighty three minutes." Sephiroth murmured, his voice almost too low for Zack to hear. "I was beginning to worry you would harm yourself badly, but I did not know what else to do."

"You did wonderfully." Genesis whispered in quiet praise. Zack returned in time to watch him unbuckle Sephiroth's chest straps with fingers that should have been deft and sure. Instead they trembled, though whether with exhausted weakness or fear was hard to tell.

Zack came over to drop off the kit and take Sephiroth's jacket back into the bedroom for him. Then he returned to sit on the coffee table and watch Genesis patch up the bloody marks in Sephiroth's forearms, wrapping the ragged tears of flesh with bandages. He nodded his approval at the imagery. The wounds didn't need to be hidden under a jacket and forgotten. They needed to be acknowledged and tended by the one who'd inflicted them. It was something Sephiroth was supremely unused to, and it showed in the uneasy way he endured it.

Only when Genesis was done did he allow Sephiroth to meticulously clean the blood from underneath his nails and over his fingertips. Zack relocated slowly as Sephiroth worked, sliding off the coffee table to nestle between their legs on the floor. Genesis hooked a calf over his shoulder instantly, and Zack cuddled against it, letting out a slow breath.

"Are you okay?" Sephiroth asked, his hand lighting briefly on Zack's spikes.

"I want Spike and Angeal to come home." Zack whispered, staring listlessly at the clock. "I don't like it when we're apart."

"Cloud may find it difficult." Genesis cautioned softly, sounding once more like himself. "You know they're stingy with his time."

"Ah, about that." Zack said, tilting his head back on the sofa to look up at them. "I became his mentor today. I'd make a joke about how messed up it is to be sleeping with your student, but I don't want Angeal to get guilty about it again."

The grin Genesis shot him was all fond softness. He stroked his fingers down Zack's cheek, his hand no longer bloody, but now smelling like sterilized alcohol pads.

"A puppy you are not." He whispered softly. "But you are still definitely a pack animal."

Zack turned to kiss the tips of his fingers and let out a slow breath. "Well, with a pack like this, who wouldn't be?"

"Zack!" Cried a delighted, familiar voice from the doorway.

Cloud Strife ran into the room in a one-man stampede, glowing and thrilled. His smile faded when his eyes lit on the huddled trio. He dropped his helmet and moved over in a swift motion to wrap his arms around Sephiroth's shoulders, pulling him instantly into a hug without any hemming or hawing or permission asking. Zack smiled up at the picture they made as Sephiroth slowly turned into the grip, resting his bruised face against Cloud's chest.

"Are you okay?" Cloud whispered, looking between the top of Sephiroth's head and Genesis.

"It's been a long day." Genesis said in reply. "Tell us your news first. You seemed excited, dearest."

"They made me a Soldier Third." Cloud whispered in reply. "I'll be getting mako doses within a week."

"That's my buddy." Zack grinned up at him.

"Hardly." Cloud said, though it was warmly spoken. "They said a certain someone specifically requested me as his student."

"What can I say? Not everyone can follow my teaching style." The grin came easier to Zack's face when he was looking at Cloud, and the adorable image of Sephiroth tangling his free hand in the back of the blond's shirt to hold him in place for their hug. "You're a unique one, Spike."

"What happened here?" Cloud asked softly. "And where's Angeal?"

"He should be back soon." Genesis murmured, still holding hands with Sephiroth. His free fingers went back to petting Zack's hair, even as he leaned up to meet Cloud in a soft kiss. "He just went out for a walk to clear his head."

But no matter how long they all waited, and how many soft reassurances they whispered and gentle kisses they shared, Angeal Hewley did not come back.

* * *

"Please tell me you found him." Genesis's voice was raw as he spoke into the radio, and Sephiroth watched him in concern, a finger pressed to the speaker in his ear to listen in.

"I think he's somewhere in this old bathhouse. I just took out a monster with his face." Zack's voice was distant, crackling with static. "He's in trouble. I think it's bad this time."

"The degradation has not been easy on him." Sephiroth said, his own voice sounded shaky, and his breath misted in the frosty air. "He is not thinking straight, Zack. We are not far from you. Hold back."

"I can't just leave him in there, Seph!"

"Zack," Cloud's voice was firmer than Sephiroth's had been, and the General was grateful for it. "He could hurt you. You know he's not himself during the flare ups."

"Neither of us are." Genesis agreed, his brows twisted in distress and the fracture marks in his skin pulling with the expression, the darkly twisted wing folded behind him stretching in distress. "Don't push it, Zack. Wait for backup. We're not far."

"I can't just leave him. He won't hurt me. I know he won't."

"Zackary, this is an order. Do not engage!" Sephiroth's voice rose, hearing the pining notes of love in Zack's voice, and feeling them echo in his heart.

"It's Angeal, Seph." Zack whispered. "He's not our enemy. I'm not going to leave him alone in there. Not while he's hurting."

"Zackary!" Sephiroth barked. Static answered.

"He took out his com." Cloud gasped, pulling off his Trooper's helmet, his cheeks tinged pink in the snow. They hadn't had time to wait for his official promotion to kick in before leaving, and he'd refused to be left behind. "Idiot, he's not thinking any clearer than Angeal."

"If it weren't for the fact that you morons loving me is all that's kept me alive, I'd denounce the whole thing as foolishness." Genesis groused, though it was through a pained expression. "You two go. I'll catch up."

"No." Cloud's voice was firm, and he turned, jogging back down the mountain to take Genesis's hand in his own. "You're not an invalid or a burden. We need you with us, and we are not leaving you behind. Let's do it."

"You certainly are sure-footed through all this." Genesis murmured.

"Just like being at home. I'm a backwater expert, you know."

"Yes, I heard you and Zack laughing about it all last week. Our sweet mountain goats."

"Let's move." Sephiroth said firmly. "As much as I would like to believe that Angeal would not hurt Zack…"

"It's not impossible." Genesis agreed, taking Cloud's hand when it was offered and turning to face the heavy climb before them. Sephiroth knew how much his knees had been hurting him the past two days, and longed to simply carry him. But Cloud was right. Genesis was not a burden or something to be carried. He was his own wonderful, beautiful, prideful being.

He turned away from the two of them, striding up the mountain side, listening with half an ear to the deafening silence from the radio.

"They'll be okay." Cloud whispered. It did not sound like as much of a statement as it should have been. And Sephiroth was pleased when Genesis stiffly wrapped an arm around Cloud's shoulders in comfort.

All that pleasure vanished after another ten minutes of hiking when the radio crackled.

"Found a little hole in the wall." Zack said into the radio. "You know how much he likes those."

"Zack—"

"I'm leaving my comm here so you can find the entrance. If he's inside you'll be able to find us by following it, I bet."

"Don't take out your—!" Sephiroth's barked order was interrupted by static, and he cursed loudly, whipping out his phone to pull up the tracker inside all their communication devices.

"This is getting bad." Genesis sounded grim. "Let's go. Fast. I can hold out. We need to get to them before they get hurt."

"That bastard Hollander." Cloud snarled, pulling out from under Gen's arm to break into a ground-eating jog across the uneven snow. "If he hadn't vanished like that—"

"Later." Sephiroth said grimly. "Angeal first. Then we handle the scientist."

"And after we handle our scientist will you finally let us handle yours?" Genesis purred, breaking into a run that had to be hell on his sore body.

Sephiroth grunted in response, picking up the pace. "Let's just get through today. Then we'll see."

The tracker in the comm led them without fail. And the moment they reached it, they didn't have to search for further directions. They sprinted up the set of snow-covered pipes towards the sound of clashing steel.

"Angeal, don't do this!" Zack's voice was cracking in terror, carrying through the high-ceilinged rooms in fear.

Sephiroth blasted forward, leaving the other two behind in a dusting of snow and sprinting towards the scream.

Despite the pain, despite the degradation, he heard Genesis sprint right behind him. The sight that awaited them almost stopped him dead in his tracks. Zack was facing off against a giant beast of a monster, all teeth, claws, and blades. The scent of their blood stained the air.

Sephiroth sprinted forward as the blades fell, summoning Masamune to his hand. She appeared like an extension of his flesh, and he lept over Zack's head to meet the falling blade of the monster that had to be Angeal.

A scream of a roar answered his interference, and behind him he heard swords clang as Genesis stopped Zack's swing.

"Angeal, stop this!" Sephiroth cried, falling back to earth as Angeal threw him aside, his monster's form supremely overpowered.

"Fall back." Genesis ordered Zack. "You're hurt, get to Cloud."

"Don't hurt him!" Zack screamed through his sobs. "Please, he won't listen to me, Genesis!"

"Put down the blade!" Sephiroth said firmly, stepping between Angeal's strange, inhuman form and his friends.

Angeal's face glared down, silent and stony. A roar echoed from the monster's mouth at the join of his human form and his animal one, but it contained no reason.

"It's over!" Sephiroth screamed. "I will not allow you to harm yourself or Zackary further! Change back, Angeal!"

He dodged the swipe of the monster Angeal's trident, rolling to avoid the sweep and stab of it. He lifted his sword to block again, keeping half an eye on the others behind him, watching Genesis drag Zack back to the panting Cloud. He kept his eyes averted a moment too long, and grunted as the trident found him, driving him to the side with a pained gasp.

The monster straightened to face him, roaring after scoring the hit. Sephiroth stared at it, then dropped Masamune to his side, glaring up at it.

"No." He said firmly. "I refuse." Blood flowed for a moment from his side where the trident had bitten, then slowed to a stop.

The creature screamed, rearing back on its hind feet. The trident bit again, and Sephiroth jerked his head to one side, a stripe scoring his cheek. He recognized the mark, distantly, from the glimpse he'd caught of Zackary.

"It's not going to work." He said firmly, striding towards the beast. "I will not hurt you! Not for anything."

The creature bellowed, trident lifting again, and Sephiroth braced himself for pain. He wasn't expecting the shadow that flew overhead.

Genesis flew up to Angeal, looking painfully frail with his grey hair and his cracked skin. He caught Angeal by the cheeks of his human face, his wing flapping slowly to keep him hovering in the air before him.

"Dearest." Genesis whispered, leaning forward till his forehead was touching Angeal's. "Please. It's over. You've done enough damage for today."

"Move!" Roared a voice that was and was not human, and was and was not familiar.

"Look at them." Genesis snapped, anchoring one hand in Angeal's too-long hair and bracing his booted feet against the armored torso of the beast. "They are bleeding and hurt, and afraid for you. I know it all looks dark, but you must not hurt them like this. You must stop."

Sephiroth couldn't help the breath of relief as he watched the form start to melt away below Genesis's careful touches.

"I am a monster." Angeal's voice whispered, more recognizable with every word.

"Dear Angeal." Genesis whispered, his voice cracking. Sephiroth watched the tear fall off his cheek as his feet reached the floor, the monsters melting dead away from Angeal. "If you are a monster, then what must you think of me?"

"Not to mention myself." Sephiroth whispered, stepping forward, hoping it wasn't wrong of him to interrupt.

"Come home." Genesis whispered, wrapping his arms around Angeal as the degrading man stood before them, human once more. "Come home with us."

"Hollander told me—" Angeal's voice choked as he stood rigid in Genesis's arms. "He told me that my mother… That Gillian…."

"You're hurt." Sephiroth said softly, walking over slowly to join his friends, carefully placing a hand on Angeal's brow, rubbing a hand through his white-streaked hair, looking over the bruises and scratches on his face. "Let us tend to you. Then you can tell us what happened. It is going to be alright."

"'Geal?" A broken, trembling voice whispered.

Sephiroth saw the moment Angeal's will broke. He sagged against Genesis, and Sephiroth had to move quickly to support them both, easing Angeal's weight out of Genesis's fragile arms.

"He's fine, Zack." Genesis called. "He's just fine."

"Zack." Angeal whispered, his eyes closed as though in great pain. "Gods… What have I done."

"Nothing that cannot be mended." Sephiroth whispered, hefting Angeal's solid weight to pull one of his arms over his shoulders. "Just as Genesis did the last time he attacked me. Just as happened when you both considered abandoning. Nothing has been harmed that cannot be set right, Angeal. We are all still here."

"I'm so sorry," Zack approached slowly, with Cloud hovering careful at his side. "I'm so sorry, 'Geal, I didn't mean to hurt you. I'm so sorry…"

"Zack, no…" Angeal whispered, his brows twisting. "No. It's not your fault."

"We should go." Cloud's voice was firm, but he moved forward as he spoke, going to join Sephiroth and Angeal, even as Genesis limped to take his place by Zack, wrapping him in a hug. "I was able to heal Zack mostly, but he's still a little hurt."

Angeal moaned, and Cloud wrapped his arms around him and Sephiroth both in response, squeezing them as though he could keep them together.

"I'm fine." Zack argued, shaking his head. "I'm fine, I just…"

"Hush, dear one." Genesis whispered, stroking Zack's cheeks, wiping away the tears there. "Everything's alright."

"I'm…" Angeal drooped against Sephiroth's shoulder, and Sephiroth supported him firmly, adjusting his hold to keep from putting too much strain on Angeal's body. "I'm so sorry."

"I have him, Cloud." Sephiroth whispered, even as their little blond mountain goat kissed Angeal's cheek softly in love and affection.

"I know you do." Cloud whispered.

"Come, Zack." Genesis brushed his hand through Zack's spikes. "Let's get you home, alright? I think we could all use to breathe after this."

"We can't leave Buster sword." Zack argued.

"I have it." Cloud said firmly, walking over to the blade. "I can carry Buster and Masamune. I'm no use in fighting or saving anyone. At the very least I can look after your swords."

"Cloud, they are too—" Sephiroth's words petered out as he watched the cadet lift Buster sword and sling it over his back, abandoning his training blade to the floor. "Heavy…"

"Just like our boy." Genesis chuckled, kissing Zack's hair.

By the time they got back to the inn, Genesis was coughing raggedly again, and Zack was in tears, holding him tightly. Angeal was out cold, breathing heavily against Sephiroth's shoulder with his white wing almost dragging on the ground. Cloud was trembling with effort, but he had carried the blades all the way down the mountain.

"Keep him warm." Sephiroth murmured as he lay Angeal on the bed. "I'll go fetch some potions to get you all looked after."

"Bed, puppy." Genesis wheezed, nuzzling affectionately against the crying Zack's hair. "I know the cold made you snuffle on the walk down, but now you can snuggle your sweetheart and warm up."

"You too, Gen." Sephiroth ordered. "Dog pile. I'll be right back."

"I'll come with you." Cloud offered, setting Buster sword against the wall. "I don't want anyone to be alone for a while."

"Right." Sephiroth agreed, watching Zack climb onto the bed at Angeal's side, stroking his hair rhythmically and trying to restrain his tears.

He walked the cadet downstairs, then drew him into a dark corner just outside the isolated cabin. Cloud was still a moment against his chest, then crumpled in tears.

"What are we going to do?" He whispered. "It keeps getting worse. If we'd been a little later…"

"Zack would have killed him." Sephiroth whispered. "Angeal would have pushed him to it."

"Seph, we have to do something."

"I will." Sephiroth whispered grimly. "I promise. Hollander… He is not the only scientist in the world. There are others. Better, smarter ones. I will find someone who can help."

"Seph? Are you talking about Hojo?" Cloud's hand was resting over his chest, the cold tears dripping off his face landing lightly on his bare skin.

"Don't be afraid." Sephiroth whispered. "He will not harm me. I will not let him. And perhaps we will find a way to help our friends…" He shook his head, correcting himself. "Our lovers."

"Don't hide from me." Cloud whispered, pulling back to gaze up at him. "I know I can't ask you not to hide from them, because they're so close to breaking right now… But I can carry some of the weight for you, Seph. Don't hide from me."

Sephiroth gazed down at him a long moment, then bent, pressing a soft kiss to his forehead. "Alright. Come. Let's supply our friends with all the medical needs they may have. Perhaps we can find some things to comfort them as well."

"Seph?" Cloud asked softly. "You got hurt too, right? Are you okay?"

"Healed already." Sephiroth whispered. "I am only… Afraid."

"You were brave. I know it's not easy for you to trust anyone. For you to put down your sword…"

"It was foolish." Sephiroth whispered, his brows twisted. "But I find… That my love for all of you makes me foolish."

Cloud pressed against his side affectionately, like an emotional balm, and stayed there for the entire trip.

* * *

Angeal woke up in a dark room, surrounded by warm bodies, and covered with a feather quilt. Only there was no quilt in the world made entirely of bare feathers and heat. He shifted, looking over to Genesis's fragile, sleeping face. Behind him lay Sephiroth, still as stone, with a protective arm wrapped over Gen, resting atop his wing over Angeal's chest.

"You're awake." Whispered a voice behind him.

Angeal closed his eyes tightly, shame pounding through him with every beat of his heart.

"Zack…" He whispered, his voice raw.

"I'm so glad you're okay." The man at his back whispered, the arms wrapped around Angeal's waist tightening in a squeezing hug. "I am so glad you're…"

Tears touched the back of Angeal's neck as Zack nuzzled against him, and though Angeal had no words to apologize with, he took Zack's hands in his own and held on as tightly as he could.

"I wish this was a dream." Angeal whispered, knowing it was childish to voice the words.

"Then let's say it was." Zack said quickly, pressed flush against his back, his lips brushing over Angeal's shoulder as he spoke. "Today was just a nightmare."

Angeal didn't have the heart to argue. He just held Zack's hands as tightly as he could. He didn't even realize he was crying until he was shaking with sobs, Zack sitting up out of bed to cradle him as though he were a precious lover instead of a monster. And then there were more arms mirroring Zack's. Cloud snuck in beside him, curling between their bodies and pressing his sleepy face to Angeal's chest. Genesis wriggled closer to his side, whispering his name and rubbing his wings in familiar affection. Even Sephiroth pressed close to the messy hold, kissing Angeal's brow and rubbing a hand up and down his arm.

"We've got you." Zack whispered, pressing his forehead to Angeal's. "We've got you."

Angeal ignored the aches and pains in his dying body, and held onto his lovers as they held him. It felt, for a moment, like it was only their hands that were holding him together at all. But looking between them, at the love in their eyes and the strength in their hearts, Angeal was certain.

They were more than enough.


End file.
